Socrates: By Hera! You want to create a ban.
Trump: Bigly. Against Muslims.
Socrates: Muslims? You must be an expert to do such a bold move.
Trump: Indeed, I am, Socrates.
Socrates: Tell me so that I can learn from your wisdom, for surely you must know much of Islam.
Socrates: I’m listening. You must have read about Islam, the philosophy, the experts, the practices. Only someone advanced in knowledge would propose a ban.
Socrates: You know people who practice Islam, yes?
Trump: Have you seen Homeland? Tremendous show.
Socrates: I have not.
Trump: It’s important to keep the country safe from terrorists.
Socrates: And could you define “terrorist”?
Trump: Look, I promised in my campaign to restore law and order.
Socrates: Of course, good fellow and patriot. Now, surely you could define law, for only someone well advanced in judicial matters who understands law would make that sort of promise.
Trump: Law is…have you met Bannon? Law is what we…I put forth for the good of the nation.
Socrates: But law is certainly broader than that. You say and write (and tweet) many things that do not fall under the category of law. Law can’t be simply what you say. It is much more. Please, good sir, don’t hold back. What is law?
Trump: Did you hear about how Nordstrom treated my daughter?
Socrates: And what is Nordstrom?
Trump: It is a business.
Socrates: And what is business? You must be an expert.
Trump: Yuge expert. I am a businessman.
Socrates: But I did not ask for an example, my friend. I asked what is a business?
Trump: It is a place where goods are bought and sold.
Socrates: I see. Thank you for that excellent response. And how did this business treat your daughter?
Trump: They will no longer sell her goods! Sad!
Socrates: Sad, indeed. And, tell me, are her goods being bought?
Trump: She is my daughter!
Socrates: And is that part of the definition of business?
Trump: I am the president and I need to keep the country safe from terrorists!
Socrates: Is Nordstrom in the business of terrorism?
Trump: I’ll be investigating.
Socrates: Your concern for safety is admirable.
Trump: Why, thank you, Socrates.
Socrates: What defines a safe country?
Socrates: Would that include religion? Or a business to conduct itself on its choice of goods?
Trump: Really, Socrates, I would love to explain it all to you but for another time. I have to post some tweets and get back to watching Fox.